Should Someone Have 86ed Star Trek: Section 31?

Clip: [0:07] Ugh, so tacky. But I guess that's what you're known for. Dave: [0:19] This is the Extra Extra Hot Great Podcast, episode 336 for the January 25th, 2025 weekend. I am Family Soup Knight, David T. Cole, and I'm here with grumpy nanobot, Sarah D. Bunting. Sarah: [0:38] Fertusoy potato fragment. Dave: [0:41] Outer space lounge singer, Tara Ariano. Tara: [0:43] I'll just sing what I want. The melody doesn't matter. Dave: [0:46] And just Sam Richardson, but in space, Andrew Cunningham. Andrew: [0:50] Set phasers to... Tara: [0:55] Welcome to Extra Extra Hot Great for another weekend. Joining us for this very special episode, he is a writer and podcaster you've heard with us on the main show, it's Andrew Coneyham! Andrew: [1:08] Hey, Andrew! Andrew: [1:14] Glad to be here. Tara: [1:15] As always, yes. Well, we have something special planned for you, so check under your chair, there's a very large weapon. We are here with Andrew because we were talking about Star Trek Section 31, and Andrew might be the only person I know who continued to watch Star Trek Discovery, which this is a spin-off of. And I tried writing the summary of this movie so many times. I think this is the most effective way to do it. Philippa Giorgio, played by Michelle Yeoh, was emperor of a viciously cruel parallel universe Earth known as the Terran Empire. She crossed into our universe, spent some time with Section 31, which is basically the Federation CIA, and then slipped away to run a nightclub in the space version of International Waters. But an unimaginably deadly weapon has now also crossed into this universe, and a new team of Section 31 agents have to involve Giorgio in the mission of intercepting and neutralizing it. Is that basically it? Dave: [2:16] That's pretty good. Tara: [2:17] Okay. Andrew: [2:18] That makes it sound so much clearer than I think it actually is. Dave: [2:22] You're hired. Tara: [2:24] As you are listening to this the movie premieres on paramount plus the same day we're dropping this podcast so if you're really hyped to watch it do that first let's do the check-in andrew should our listeners watch star trek section 31. Andrew: [2:39] No. No. Tara: [2:41] Sarah? Sarah: [2:43] No. Big no. Tara: [2:44] Dave? Dave: [2:45] Yeah, no. It would be highly illogical to put it in Star Trek terms. Tara: [2:48] You know, I think, just kidding, no. It's a no for me as well. So let's get into it. This is being presented to the public as a movie. It is, in fact, a failed pilot. Andrew, talk about the ways you felt that really shows if you did. Dave: [3:02] Keep in mind, we got about like 20 minutes or so. Andrew: [3:04] Right, yeah. I mean, it's split up into what, like two or three little chapters, which most movies I don't think are. You know, I haven't spent a lot of time in theaters since the pandemic started, but I don't remember movies being like that. And then also, you know, everybody's, like all the costuming, all the sets, all the special effects, very made for TV in ways that are distracting and not great. it's trying to be a star trek thing but mostly just by like making weird deep references to the series it kind of works better to the extent that it works at all as like a sort of a brain off like action thing and they leave it open at the end for more stories to be told but i'm i really hope that they don't they don't follow that impulse and tell more stories i think i'm good with this. Dave: [3:53] I was trying to uh i was telling the discord about it because you know there's a lot of like really big star trek fans in the discord so i said a while ago oh we got the screeners you know and we saw when the embargo was i was like oh shit the embargo is actually, effectively the day of release and we're like well that's bad news for you guys probably and then i watched it and i was like i can't tell you anything about it yet but i was going to try to nutshell the vibe and i was like this is like somebody inside the limitations of a 90s non Next Generation syndicated show. So like Hercules, the legend continues, Cleopatra 2525 of those ilk. Trapped inside of a Tarantino first wave wannabe movie, all kind of wrapped up in a dirty dozen Suicide Squad. Sarah: [4:37] Yeah, good comment. Andrew: [4:38] Yeah, yeah. Dave: [4:39] That's sort of the alchemy involved here. And it is more anything, more everything of the Star Trek universe. And as Andrew says, barely feel Star Trek a lot of the times. Also, to me, I don't know how meaningful this comparison is going to be for a lot of you, But there was a slice of time in the early aughts where there were all these Eastern European directors doing sort of video game movies or heavily influenced by video game movies, where it's very kinetic. And it was like, what more can we jam in here? Tara: [5:10] Wanted. Yeah. Dave: [5:11] Well, not so much those big ones, but there was like, like heart. There's one was like bullet Henry or something like that. And they're chasing him around in first person and all this. But it felt like that sort of excess or to put it another way, it was Homer Simpson's all star wipes all the time, even like because when they're doing all their exposition, they're doing so through a Star Trek version of the Bourne identities, you know, like here's a map of Europe. Zoom in and useless numbers next to the name Berlin and all that stuff, except it's like the Star Trek version. And it makes absolutely no sense. Andrew: [5:47] They do a lot of that like Ocean's Eleven heist movie thing where they describe something that happened or was supposed to happen and then you get to watch it happen because that's very exciting, but yeah it all ends up like feeling like a big weird exposition dump they're clearly trying to do like you said a Suicide Squad thing where this is a bunch of like undesirables from within the Federation who have gotten together to be anti-heroes together but you don't. Dave: [6:15] Care about any of them or. Andrew: [6:17] Want to spend time with any of them like the response to one of your heroes laying dead in a pool of their own blood should not be like oh good i don't have to. Dave: [6:26] Like pay attention to this person anymore which. Andrew: [6:28] Is how i felt anytime anyone got taken off. Dave: [6:30] The board. Andrew: [6:32] In this movie. Dave: [6:32] Well it's not only that they're one dimensional but they're also like one dick like they're very much of that one voice yeah when i was talking about the tarantino sort of it that's sort of what made the bubble up that comparison because like there's the leader there is the jarhead guy who has a mech suit there is the woman who can seduce anybody in the universe except for sam richardson there's sam richardson who is a shapeshifter there is the stick up her ass star fleet officer trying to hold it all together and that's sort of oh i'm sorry oh my god i can't believe i forgot there is the irish robot vulcan with a tiny little men in black alien who lives inside of his head. Let that sit for a second. Andrew: [7:16] I do really, I am obsessed with both Star Trek and Star Wars shows do this when you find the aliens that are from the Irish part of space. I really, I enjoy that. Like, is the universal translator doing that? Or how is that coming through? I don't know. Tara: [7:31] I mean, it did give us Sarah's pretty good Irish accent in the intro, so there is that. Sarah, I'm going to go to you because a lot of the headlines I'm reading about this indicate that this is supposed to be a comedy? Was that your feeling? Did it work for you, at least on a comic level? I know the answer is no, but speak more on that. Sarah: [7:54] I mean, no, because... Sarah: [7:57] As we've said, they all have the same style of dialogue. It's how, like, on Dawson's Creek, the parents and all the kids were overwritten and, like, misusing various vocab words in the same exact way. Whether it's Jen Lindley or a teacher or some extra, like, everybody talks kind of the same. So there was that problem. It reminded me of, like, one of the Thor movies that wasn't funny. It's just really straining for cleverness. But then based on dialogue, you can't really distinguish these, quote, characters who have half a dimension from one another. And then the Doug Lyman Batman choreography, which just indicates, like, it's not even fight choreo. It's just, we're going to whip the camera around a bunch so you can't tell that we don't know what the hell we're doing. Like that's, that's not great. Like all of it just seemed like a huge waste. There might have been fun character beats in here. I wanted there to be better fighting given who's doing it, but it's like, it was just so boring and led in the whole time. And you don't get to the actual like story conflict until you're like a third of the way through. So it really was like three episodes crammed together into a backdoor pilot that failed. And that's why. Dave: [9:21] Yeah it shows the the one part that i thought almost elevated it to like oh this is kind of fun was there's a early movie fight between giorgio and this dude in a motorcycle helmet and they phase in and out of their current reality into like a separate slightly off one and so they have either match each other's phase and fight or unmatch and then run away from each other that was like in theory cool but they kept on repeating it was like on a loop they have a couple swings at each other and then georgia whips her long cape at him and tangles it up and gets him closer and they punch some more and they do that again and again and there was like this money shot of them flipping around where the whole camera does a 360 to show you know their orientation it's like well okay that's flashy it doesn't really feel like star trek but whatever it's there it's an action see and then they do the exact same camera thing again five seconds later you're like okay this director actually doesn't know that less is more and when to pull your punches and that is like the story of the direction of this it was just like so much all the time but not so much all the time fun it was so much all the time what are you compensating for and yeah and it just kind of like fell so full and empty at the same time yeah by the way just because in case nobody mentions again the irish falcon robot is named colin par farell just so you know. Andrew: [10:48] Of the action i'll also say lots of lots of punching and sword fighting for it for a universe that does have ray guns yeah and i did like like you david i almost found that like fight where they're phasing in and out of each other's like. Dave: [11:02] Yeah, reality or whatever. Andrew: [11:04] Vibrations or whatever it is. They're good vibes. Almost interesting. But then they had to go and kind of ruin it by having things also phasing through walls, which immediately raises the question, like, why are floors solid but walls are not? Sarah: [11:18] Yeah. Andrew: [11:19] It's a failure of a sci-fi action sequence, I think, when you hit a question like that that takes you out of the action while you're still in it, you know? Dave: [11:29] They need to do one of two things. Number one, go to the team that created Ghost UK and just admit that they don't know why they don't fall through the floor all the time or why they can sit but not go through the walls. Or that fight starts, they both phase, and it goes to a wide shot of the whole space station. You just see these two little things fall down very slowly through the ship into space. And the movie ends. Sarah: [11:52] Sure. Andrew: [11:53] But yeah, just as an action movie was not super compelling. as a Star Trek thing that is about like this within the fandom, like pretty divisive sort of CIA concept that sort of, I don't know, it ruins the sunny like utopian optimism that most of the rest of the series tries to go for. Like it's not interested in grappling with any of those questions and it's not good at being exciting or entertaining in other ways. And so you're kind of left. Like I was hoping to like this because I thought in Discovery, Michelle Yeoh playing the horny bloodthirsty version of that character like she was just clearly having fun the whole time and she was fun to to watch and it was fun to have her show up in stories and then this just kind of didn't capitalize on any of that which was disappointing i think yeah. Tara: [12:39] She's kind of bad in this i thought yeah actually it's not her fault i. Andrew: [12:44] Don't think but it yeah. Sarah: [12:45] It was a campy performance that i you know she was trying. Andrew: [12:49] Mm-hmm. Tara: [12:50] I'm not sure she was trying, honestly. She seemed like she was at half speed. Andrew: [12:54] Personally. Tara: [12:55] I mean, for an Oscar winner, it was very half-assed. I would be remiss if I didn't mention this movie stars two people that belong to gyms I have formerly belonged to. Dave: [13:05] Yeah, right. Tara: [13:05] The mech guy is one. He went to the same gym as me in L.A. And then Sonia Smits, who played the Hunger Games presider person in the flashback, went to my gym in Toronto. Sarah, you might remember her as the lady lawyer from, as it was known in the U.S., Bay Street, the legal drama. Sarah: [13:23] Oh, yeah. It was her. Tara: [13:25] Have I seen her boobs? The answer is yes. In the locker room. It was in a context where that made sense. I feel like we can leave it here because, Andrew, you're the only one who is qualified to answer this. Does Paramount just need to salt the Discovery Earth so nothing grows there again? And like, is Discovery just a failed, you know, branch of the tree? Andrew: [13:49] It's what I would prefer. I feel like they've got like some kind of Starfleet Academy spinoff brewing that I want to say is another Discovery offshoot. I'm not sure what the timeline is for that. Like, not in fiction, but like when it's coming out in our universe. Sarah: [14:06] No, I feel like we've been hearing about that for enough years that it's like that Devil in the White City thing that it's like, oh, no, we're doing it again. No, you're not. Yeah. Andrew: [14:15] I mean, like the Star Trek, the Starfleet Academy idea has been bouncing around since like the 90s. So it's very much a I'll believe it when I see it kind of thing. I'm in a still, even after all this time and all these series, I still will give any new Star Trek thing the benefit of the doubt at first, but. Yeah, anything that has touched Discovery, I have lowered hopes for at this point than anything else that the franchise is doing. Dave: [14:40] If you're not into Star Trek, I think I would say that Section 31 is your book of Boba Fett. Andrew: [14:48] Harsh but fair, I think. Tara: [14:50] Apparently, this really is happening, the Starfleet Academy show. They are shooting it now. Dave: [14:54] Oh, they cast a lot of names, too. Tara: [14:56] Yeah, Paul Giamatti, Tatiana Maslany, Holly Hunter is like the lead. And they're already working on season two. So this one might be real good. Andrew: [15:04] Tbd we'll see do we want and do we just want to mention that jamie lee curtis is in this at the end like is that too spoilery or i just assume she said i would like to be on star trek to a monkey's paw and then this is what yeah this is what happened like this is how that came to be or. Tara: [15:21] Sometime on the set of everything everywhere all at once michelle yo was like if i have to do this thing will you please just come and make it a little bit more bearable for like a day even though. Andrew: [15:31] I'm sure they never shot together. Dave: [15:34] And then at the end, the Irish Vulcan comes back and now he's from the South. Right. Hooray for Star Trek. Dave: [15:51] I'll speak about things that come from evil mirror universes. It's the Ask EHG theme, which you're enjoying right now. Enjoy. I know I am. All right, let's get to it. We've got last week's Ask, Ask, EHG judgments to get through. Sarah D. Bunting is our judge. Sarah. Sarah: [16:21] Yes, I am. Last week's Ask, Ask, EHG came from Grizzly Claire, who asked, You've been tasked with declaring an eighth sin. What are you adding to the list? I believe that our co-hosts have answers for this. David T. Cole? Dave: [16:36] Yeah, I have one. I was trying to keep it to like one word so you can slot it in with envy and sloth and all that. So I'm calling mine disconjunction. And that's when you block foot traffic by stopping at junctions, whether they're T junctions at the end of a grocery store or like an intersection because you're on your phone and you're not going when it's green. That's one of the worst things that you can do to your fellow humans. And so disconjunction is my eighth deadly sin. Sarah: [17:02] Good one. Tara? Tara: [17:04] My initial thought was smugness. And then I realized that's probably already under the umbrella of pride. So I'm going to go with whining, just the noise, but also just general like complaining. I could do with it. Sarah: [17:17] Andrew, do you have one for this? Andrew: [17:19] I haven't boiled it down to one word, but what if it was frowned upon to make coffee your whole personality? I feel like there should be repercussions for that. Sarah: [17:33] Micro-monoculturalism? Andrew: [17:35] Yeah, agree. Dave: [17:36] Oh my god, yeah. Andrew: [17:37] Yeah, that's good. Dave: [17:39] Cosign. Sarah: [17:40] We did have some excellent listener answers, including Big Kev47, who nominated Nostalgia. I'm not actually sure what that means, but it was a poser, so I left it in. P.D. Exorcist says the Eighth Deadly Sin is using the words narcissist, gaslighting, and trauma when what you actually mean is a person I dislike, telling me something I don't want to hear, and a mild to moderate inconvenience, respectively. Yeah, there's a couple other podcasts on which I object to this on a regular basis. Good note. erica was not alone in saying not using headphones in public and especially in public transit, deadly and for sure uh sin and our old friend adam 807 proposed taking four years between tv seasons but our winner today is lt yelling my dog is friendly as your off leash dog It turns out is not friendly. I hear that in my bone marrow as the leasher of the not friendly dog. So, LT, congratulations. Your sin has made the sin canon around here. Please DM David T. Cole directly to collect your sticker bounty. Dave: [18:59] Yes, DM me on Discord, please. And there's a few people that have won recently that have not yet DM me. You have to DM me with your address if you want the sticker. So please do that. All right. Let's get to your questions for us this week. First one comes from Dr. Calhoun. Make your dream SNL cast of eight former cast members from the whole pool of historical cast members. Tara, what do you got? Eight. Tara: [19:21] I'm going to go with Will Ferrell, Bill Hader, Phil Hartman, Jan Hooks, Leslie Jones, Ego Nwodem. Unfortunately, Jason Sudeikis, because he's a bad person, apparently, but very good on that show. and Kristen Wiig, Sarah. Sarah: [19:38] Yeah, we are going to have a lot of overlap here. I think Nora Dunn, Will Ferrell, Phil Hartman, Michael McKean, Norm MacDonald, Molly Shannon, and Kristen Wiig. Andrew? Andrew: [19:51] I'm just going to co-sign Tara's list. I don't have a lot to add. I think it's pretty strong. Phil Hartman was top of list because that also would presumably mean he was still around to do other projects, which is important to me. Sarah: [20:05] Exactly. Dave: [20:06] All right. I'm going chronologically. I got Eddie Murphy first, and then John Lovitz, Dana Carvey, Phil Hartman, Mike Myers, Will Ferrell, Will Forte, and then throwing them a bone, Kristen Wiig. You're welcome, ladies. Seth, I just saw Nosferatu, where several characters have big old mustaches. What current TV character would be improved with a big old mustache? Sarah. Sarah: [20:29] The morning show's cory ellison is perfect just as he is but i think he would enjoy having a big old mustache and literally twirling it in meetings and then pointing out that he's twirling it so let's make that happen andrew. Andrew: [20:42] Uh let's go with philippa georgio from the star trek section 31 movie facial hair often a marker of someone being from the evil mirror universe so i just think it's appropriate and that she would she would wear the hell out of it yeah great i. Dave: [20:58] Gotta go with baby Yoda. Tara: [21:01] I'm going to say the Dane DeHaan character, Jacob Pratt in American Primeval, because the evil Mormons might take him more seriously if he had a great big mustache. And if not, at least it would distract from his weeping scalp wound. Dave: [21:17] The word weeping really gets me. Deatho asks, Taylor Sheridan feels the need to be a character in most of his creations. If another creator did this, who would they be in their own show? Andrew, what do you got for this? Andrew: [21:31] What if Dick Wolf just appeared as a murder victim in every episode of every Law & Order show? I think that would be fun. Dave: [21:39] That would be great. Only one person dies from now on Law & Order and it's Dick Wolf. Andrew: [21:42] Just a little Hitchcockian signature of his. Dave: [21:46] That's brilliant. I'm angry I have to follow that. I'm going to go with Joanna Callow and Christopher Storer as food critics on The Bear. who slum it to review the beef on the bear and take back one star because they didn't get the pebbly red Pizza Hut soda glasses that they use. That feels like their speed these days. Tara? Tara: [22:06] I'm going to say Severance's Dan Erickson would probably, if he thought he had the power, put himself in that show as Rickon, Mark's brother-in-law who writes the weird self-help book from season one and thinks very highly of himself. Sarah? Sarah: [22:21] I think Greg Berlanti would have showed up as Jughead's literary agent on Riverdale. Dave: [22:28] And with an E, what's the one thing you wish showrunners would start or stop doing in 2025? Yeah. Going from Squid Game, I'm going to say labeling half seasons as full seasons. I realize that's probably a large part of that is a network directive. But if you have the juice as a big showrunner, fuck that shit. I just find annoying for some dumb reason when they try to gaslight you into thinking that you are getting two seasons when you're just getting two half seasons. Tara: [22:58] If you're going to break format for a departure episode, have a good reason for doing it other than we just thought it would be fun and cool and we wanted to cast some of these roles as younger people or whatever. You're supposed to be telling a story. Tell a story. Sarah. Sarah: [23:15] Seasons of television are now routinely at least a year apart. Previously on reels need to be mandatory. I am not a crackpot. Dave: [23:24] Oh, good one. Tara: [23:25] Yeah, that's a good one. Andrew: [23:26] Uh again maybe slightly outside the purview of the showrunner but can we start shooting things where the foreground and the and the like the background of a scene are both in focus at the same time instead of having everything be a big blurry mess because it just makes everything look green screened and. Dave: [23:42] It drives. Andrew: [23:43] Me drives me up. Dave: [23:44] Yeah sometimes the depth of field is way too much i will add to that sort of an inverse of that is when they do those somebody's in the extreme foreground and then there's somebody in the extreme backgrounds in a doorway on the other side of the room and they composite it so they're both in focus when that shot can never really due to physics be that way every time i see that shot it takes me out of it because i know it's absolutely composited and it annoys me and every time it comes up i complain to tara about it and she's like yes yes yeah. Sarah: [24:13] No i do that too ask dan learn to do a focus poll it's wait i got one more. Dave: [24:18] Oh, okay. Tara: [24:19] Stop doing the smash into action and then say four days earlier, whatever. Dave: [24:25] Oh, yeah. I mean, we've been complaining about that after the last eight years, at least, since the rise of streaming. Tara: [24:30] But they haven't listened, so I'm saying it again. Dave: [24:32] Okay, sure. Sarah: [24:32] Good point. Dave: [24:33] Pyra, what's the best dessert you make for yourself when you want a dessert thing? Tara. Tara: [24:38] The true answer is the icebox cake with the chocolate wafers, but they stopped making them, and I'm still mad about it. So I'm going to say if I wanted to make something as a real treat, as opposed to like Rice Krispie squares, which are very easy, peanut butter confetti squares. When my sister lived with us in Toronto, she used to make them all the time and it was deadly because they're so fucking good. Sarah: [24:59] So good. Tara: [25:00] But I will put the recipe into the show notes, but it's super easy. It's basically like just put marshmallows in a pan, pour melted peanut butter over them, put in fridge, the end. Dave: [25:12] Die. Tara: [25:12] I think there's butterscotch chips too but seriously that's it it's it's super easy and super good all right sarah. Sarah: [25:19] Butterscotch chips are like the underrated pantry hero. Tara: [25:23] In my opinion. Yep. Sarah: [25:25] I don't know if this counts as like making a dessert versus like blending two desserts, but fuck it. Crumble up a handful of Kars lemon ginger cream cookies, and then I stir them into vanilla ice cream. It is delicious. Tara: [25:38] That sounds real good. Sarah: [25:39] And easy, because I don't like spending time on food that's just going to become poo. That's just how I feel. Andrew. Andrew: [25:46] I have a medium F-er answer and a low F-er answer. The medium effort answer is there is a Sally's Baking Addiction recipe for giant chocolate chip cookies. It says to make six cookies where you should make eight. And it says no chilling is required where you should chill the dough before you bake it. But if you do those two things, you're going to have a really good time. The low effort answer is did you know you can make Dunkaroos yourself by buying a can of frosting and a box of graham crackers? Dave: [26:16] Yep. Tara: [26:18] Wow. Didn't realize we were talking to a woman in STEM. Good job. Dave: [26:24] When I saw this question, I had to answer. My first answer was by make, do you mean open? Because that's my dessert routine. I don't like anything to do with flour or melting chocolate. I'm like, oh, no can do. But then everybody's talking about what they had reminded me that my recent creation, and this is super sad, guys, is I take one of the animal crackers from the giant tub that's with three B's of animal crackers we got from Costco. I take one of those and then I take one of the peanut butter M&M's and I squish it between my fingers so it cracks open. Then I stick that on the cookie and I eat them both at the same time. That is what I make. Tara: [27:01] Science! Dave: [27:03] Kimba asks, Samuel L. Jackson, Jason Momoa, John Stamos, and Drew Barrymore are all hawking mobile games. Who would be the best or worst celebrity to endorse one of your favorite mobile games. Sarah: [27:17] I think Tara will agree with me that the word game that we play together, Capitals, could really benefit from Werner Herzog somberly reading a list of words he and we cannot believe the software will accept. Cunty. Andrew: [27:33] Andrew. Any big action star, you want to take like a Keanu Reeves maybe, who would endorse a word game, I think would just be a lot of fun. A lot of opportunities for dramatic reading in the same vein. as what you just said. Dave: [27:49] I've been playing this game called Balatro. It is barely a poker game. It is actually a poker-themed deck-building game, if you know what those are. You win by gathering up power-up cards of various stripes and ilks, and you combine them to kind of build the greatest multiplier value against a poker hand that you managed to create. If that's confusing, don't worry about it. It's more of a strategy game than a card game. The gameplay loop that's involved is equal measures exciting and truly annoying, because some of it is up to what cards you get. So with that in mind, I'm going to suggest Steve-O as my spokesman for somebody very apt. And then my bad choice is actually more of a chance to do something weird. And this one's for Sarah. I'm going to have a confused Steve Van Zantz make those Silvio faces, you know, on one half of the screen while the other half of the screen shows that gameplay, which doesn't make a lick of sense until you've actually played the game for about 20 minutes. Sarah: [28:44] I love it. Tara: [28:45] Obviously, I went straight to my favorite game, Ballsort Water Cuddler Puzzle, and I have a best and a worst. The best is obviously Jane Krakowski as Jenna Maroney singing balls, balls, balls, balls, balls, balls. And the worst or possibly best, honestly, is Christopher Hewitt as Mr. Belvedere. Dave: [29:06] Yeah. Sarah: [29:06] All right. Dave: [29:07] Fair enough. LBBB, what's the most trivially vital job you could think of that we never see on screen in a TV show universe? And the example here was someone on Game of Thrones must be the crypt candle lighter, because every time anybody goes down to the crypt, it's always lit and somebody has to light those. So something along those lines where there is an invisible hand doing these jobs that must be vital to the universe, but we never actually get to see. Andrew, do you have anything for this one? Andrew: [29:35] You know, someone's got to, in a Star Trek themed episode that I'm here, you know, as an expert in the universe, somebody's got to fix all those panels on the bridge after they explode during a fight, but we never see them cleaning up after the exploded panels. Dave: [29:53] Yeah, not even, did Lower Decks ever have like a janitor go around? Andrew: [29:57] Lower Decks had one that I almost went with, where sometimes it was their job to clean out the nasty goop out of the holodecks after people went in there and did really gross stuff in them. That's right. But we do see that on screen, thanks to that show. Dave: [30:13] Oh, my God. Andrew: [30:14] So I couldn't go with it. Dave: [30:15] Before I give my answer, I have to give a shout out to the greatest of all time. And that's the person in the 13 colonies of Battlestar Galactica who spends their days in a small room cutting all the corners off the paper to make them octagons. So, you know, Keep up the good work, dude. We're all counting on you. My new answer is the people in the post-apocalypse responsible for the arrangement of the Fallout tech vault welcome baskets that they get. Remember when Maximus and what's-her-name go into the vault and he gets cleaned up and he's in a robe and there's a thank-you basket there? Somebody's got to put those together. There is some sort of arrangement person in the post-apocalyptic world of Fallout, and they're also doing good work because that looks like a nice welcome basket. Yep. Tara: [31:00] Well, ever since the second season of Bad Sisters introduced me to the idea of a menopause coach, I'm going to say that is the job on And Just Like That, because you know all those rich 50-something New York ladies have a menopause coach, and they're probably fighting over them like they've fought over the good nannies in town in a previous generation. So that's my answer for that. Sarah. Sarah: [31:25] Whoever was in charge of making sure that the vintage car game was on point for the Americans, because I am married to vintage car cop and he we are through an entire season, not a peep, not a peep for car cop. So they do a really good job. And also whoever has to like write to the whatever heritage section of the DMV for permission to destroy the last Chevy Nova in Northern Virginia or whatever it is they have to do. So well done. Dave: [31:56] Dr. Calhoun is back. Original Star Trek visited a lot of planets that were just mono versions of Earth. He had the gangster planet, the Roman Empire planet, etc. What version of Earth should the Enterprise visit next? I'm going to go with pirate Earth. And Earth, that's just a collection of pirate clans sailing around, flying around, beating each other up, boarding each other's ships. And then there has to be sort of like the king pirate scenario. So it's a lot like the gangster planet, except they're pirates. All right. A bit of a cheat. Tara. Tara: [32:24] I want to go to cheerless goth earth because I've got to see young Spock from Strange New Worlds in those looks. That face was made to be on top of like a long black jacket with a high collar. Sarah: [32:40] The Downton planet. Dave: [32:41] Oh. Andrew: [32:42] Yeah. Sarah: [32:43] I also want to see any version of Spock as Mr. Bates. I really think it would improve matters. Andrew. Andrew: [32:51] So the gangster planet arose because of some kind of cultural contamination thing where someone from Earth left like a book about Chicago gangs and then the whole planet modeled its whole culture on that. So what if that but like a mighty, mighty Boston CD? What if we what if we made a Scott? Sarah: [33:09] What if we made a Scott planet? Oh, no. The skankin pickle verse. Dave: [33:17] All right speaking of pickles our last question for the group is from to pickles our favorite vulcan pickle person what is the expected number of brownies to cut in an eight by eight pan this is mostly for tara so you go first. Tara: [33:30] Yeah, I don't remember the conversation that elicited this, but I'm going to say 16. Yeah, 16. Dave: [33:36] Also agree. Tara: [33:37] Yeah, four by four. Dave: [33:38] Oh, Sarah disagrees. Sarah, how many do you have? Sarah: [33:41] No, two cuts each way for the tic-tac-toe board. Nine. What kind of teeny brownies are you fucking with over there? Dave: [33:49] Yeah, but the brownies are rich. I like those two bite brownie sizes. I've become used to them. All right. Tara: [33:55] I'll not be brownie shamed. Dave: [33:56] Yeah, me either. Andrew. Sarah: [33:58] Oh, yeah, you will. Dave: [33:59] How many brownies are you cutting here? Or I mean, who knows what Andrew's doing? Maybe he's like. Andrew: [34:03] Be ambitious. Believe in yourself. No cuts. Dave: [34:06] One for hell. Sarah: [34:07] Yeah. Andrew: [34:09] Shoot for the stars. Tara: [34:11] Wait. So are you just saying you eat, your serving is one pan? Or you're just cutting them willy-nilly as you feel? Andrew: [34:18] No, you just scoop the whole thing out. That's one serving. Sarah: [34:20] One fork. No questions. Tara: [34:22] Love it. Sarah: [34:23] Got it. Dave: [34:24] All right. I wasn't expecting that to answer, but that might be the best one. All right. Beez or Laura, everybody, has your Ask Ask EHG question. This is for you listeners to answer on the Discord. What two characters from the same show who never overlapped their time on that show would you most like to see together? So they never met, but you wish they did on the show that they were on. Go to the Ask Ask EHG channel on our Discord. Put your answers there. We'll be back next week to give out that prize. Dave: [34:54] It is time for the tiny canon presenting this week is mark s with our first ever game show prize tiny canon hello x-rat great and thank you for listening to my submission of a tiny canon. Dave: [35:09] I actually. Tara: [36:38] What would I be most scared of? I took high octane to mean adrenaline inducing, frightening basically. Okay. And the most frightening thing I could think of was stealing something, specifically from you, the, couple of weeks ago, you performed at the Comedy Garden in Bristol, and I had liaised with some of the other actors. And I lost my trousers! That is amazing, because the last thing I said as I left that gig was, who loses fucking trousers? And you've made me swear now, you mean! Sarah: [37:28] My compass was Ed Gamble. Ed Gamble, yeah. The comedian Ed Gamble. And I thought that he got in his car very quickly as well. Yes, it got in his car quickly. Tara: [37:41] Item. I'm in. Well, I'm not beating that. Thank you so much, Mark S. You will also know him if you're on our Discord as Jonas3. So we appreciate the contribution. I'll go first. Sarah can be sandwiched between the two actual Taskmaster watchers. Yeah, this is a hilarious choice. Opening the door to a Game Show Prize Tiny Cannon also implies eventually we can do a Game Show Prize Tiny Nonac, and there certainly have been plenty of options of that. On Taskmaster, a lot of people just straight up misunderstanding the assignment, saying, I'm bringing this person. Like, that's not a prize. A person can't go home with the winner. Be serious, please. Dave: [38:23] I realize they can't just disqualify people. It's a very yes and sort of environment. Tara: [38:27] Sure. Dave: [38:27] But when you have a task prize you submit that actually can't be taken away, you know, whether they actually take any of these things in their real life or not, I feel like that is the very basic, the foundation of what the prize task should be. So when it is something jokey, like I'm bringing in House of Lords, blah, blah, blah person, it's like, well, no, you're not. You know, I'm bringing in my firstborn. Like, no, you're not. Tara: [38:50] No, you're not. Dave: [38:50] So I feel like there's people that take it seriously, but still have fun. And there's people that do stuff like that or just obviously forgot about it and then brought something in that the day of was around and it sucks, too. Tara: [39:04] So count on hearing more of that from me in the future because I got opinions. But we're not here to talk about that. We're here to talk about Mark Watson bringing in Greg's stolen pants. And I do love this. It is very clear how delighted Greg is to have this mystery solved. There is nothing more frustrating than when you, like, randomly lose something and you can't understand why. Even if you find it again, you're like, well, how did he even get over where it was when I found it so annoying? And so to hear, like, the mini heist story involving Ed Gamble, like, just snatching them from his dressing room and driving away very quickly after the gig, like, all of it is great. It is a high-octane submission. I love it. Good choice. Thank you so much. Mark S., not Mark W. Sarah. Sarah: [39:52] I had some doubts about whether to vote for this just because I am not Taskmaster conversant. And it's like, this is very funny and clever, but based on Taskmaster I have seen before, this maybe wasn't like that far above other prizing ideas, just in my experience. But listening to it again with Mark's explanation, it does strike me that this is very compact and concise and elegantly done for that reason, like that two sort of two people are participating in sort of finishing a story that the show guy started. I think that that's worthwhile, even if it's not necessarily like I was busting a gut and it might be more effective for people who have been watching the show all along and have a better grounding in it. But like I said, listening to it again, they really get a lot of backstory and sort of nodding at why this is funny and clever without actually having to over-explain it. So I think that's probably Tiny Cannon worthy. Dave? Dave: [41:00] Yeah, that was my one question for you. It was like, does it play for people that don't have the experience with the full dynamics of the show, especially with like it's Greg as his personality and Alex and then how it plays off some of the contestants? Yeah. Not all tracks. That makes sense. Mark Watson in this season sort of comes across as a cautious, nervous Nelly type. So that really is an added bonus for this one. Like there have been other people that have inserted themselves into Greg's life for a prize task. Rod Gilbert being chief among them, who he is really good friends with and does all the stuff. Like he sneaks his house at night and takes photos of him sleeping and things like that, which I thought was really funny. Some people don't enjoy that, but I thought it was great. And this is sort of of that ilk, but from somebody who seems wholly wholesome and sort of like he's there, but he has this like giddy nervous energy because it's something that's sort of outside of his comfort. zone, which makes it all the better, I think. Tara: [41:58] Yeah. Dave: [41:58] So I think it's like a great mix of personalities where he stole these pants. He's sort of nervous to present them because he stole these pants. It is not his nature. And then Greg is fully delighted. You know, this curmudgeon of a taskmaster is fully delighted to have the mystery of the missing trousers solved. And it feels like there's this mini film that we don't see of the caper and you're sort of like playing it in your in your mind's eye, which I think elevates this prize task above others. So I think it is a great selection by Mark S for Mark W's prize test. So let's put this to the official vote. Tara Ariano. Tara: [42:34] Yay. Dave: [42:35] Sarah D. Bunting. Sarah: [42:36] Yay as well. Dave: [42:37] Yeah, me too. So Mark Watson's high octane item from Taskmaster Series 5, Episode 5, A Wind Dry Puffin. You are hereby inducted into the extra hot, great, tiny game show prize cannon. Dave: [42:50] Americans love a winner. Yup. And will not tolerate a loser. Nope. It is time for the Not Quite Winners and Losers of the Week. Andrew Cunningham is back from his 50-minute bathroom break. So welcome back, Andrew. Andrew: [43:05] Thank you. It was rough in there, but... Dave: [43:06] I will start first. Our Not Quite Winner of the Week numero uno is Harry Potter Wizards of Baking, which is a TV show that's been renewed for a second season that I had no idea even existed. And why does it exist? Never mind, like, just the, you know, J.K. Rowling's is a shithead. Why are we sending money her way of it all? But what the fuck does Harry Potter have to do with baking? Oh, I started to do a dive on this. And this is basically an excuse to have cameos from the B team from the movies to appear. And Judge Who Makes the Greatest, I don't know, Dragon Cake or something like that. But, oh, God. You know, sometimes synergy goes too far. And we just end up with baking shows based on children magic use or movies. And no thank you. Not quite loser of the week is Netflix, which will not realize the series filled with mystery and risks that David Lynch was working on before his death. Not even Netflix really knows exactly what it was about, but it sounds like it was just going to be blank check, David Lynch, go, go on with your weird self. And, you know, would have been nice to have that one last thing. But unfortunately, that is not going to happen. So sad for Netflix, sad for us all. Tara: [44:18] I get the impression that if you get into business with David Lynch as a media company, you're like, you just have to decide. Whatever he's going to do is whatever he's going to do. He's not going to take notes. We'll just see what it is. We'll get what we get, and we won't get upset. Dave: [44:32] All right, Sarah, who is your not-quite-winner of the week? Sarah: [44:34] My not-quite-winner is my birthday mate, William Shatner, who is receiving the Lifetime Achievement Award at the 52nd Annual Saturn Awards next month. That does seem sort of overdue. The man will be turning 94 in March, but better late. Oh, that's my friend. Dave: [44:58] Yes. Sarah: [44:59] Yes, it is. He's a friend to us all. less so my not quite loser sean combs for two reasons one is that channel four is just the latest channel to make a documentary about him i have seen one of the three and a half in process it was bad um and not just because he is bad but um i should say allegedly he's bad because he has also slapped an accuser the accuser's lawyer and others in that orbit with a like $50 million defamation suit, which is just SOP, I guess, for these guys who like deny everything, admit nothing. So yeah, Sean Combs. I'm also kind of a loser because 20 years ago, I kind of had like a, I don't know, marketing and empire crush on him. I regret that. I am sorry to his survivors. Dave: [45:51] Oh, the old M&E crush. Sarah: [45:52] Yeah, you know the one. Dave: [45:54] Andrew. Sarah: [45:55] Andrew. Andrew: [45:55] So, winner for this week, in the long-awaited season premiere of Severance Season 2, there is an internal work video about all the changes they've made to make the horrible, secretive organization allegedly less horrible and secretive. And the voice of a personified office building in that video is Keanu Reeves in a secret cameo that nobody on the show wanted to or was allowed to talk about before it happened. So just exciting times between this and the third Sonic the Hedgehog movie for anyone who was hoping that Keanu would pivot hard into voice acting at this point in his career. Dave: [46:35] Who does he play in Sonic? Andrew: [46:37] He is Shadow the Hedgehog. Dave: [46:39] Wow. All right. Sarah: [46:40] Good for you. Dave: [46:41] He's worked so hard. Andrew: [46:42] This movie's evil hedgehog who then turns out to have a heart of gold. He was just misunderstood. Dave: [46:48] Who is your not quite loser of the week? Andrew: [46:49] I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but Kelsey Grammer's Frasier reboot was canceled at Paramount Plus after two wonderful seasons. CBS says it's shopping it around, which I'm sure they have to say to make Kelsey feel better. But once you've been booted off at Paramount Plus, who will have you? I don't know. Tara: [47:13] Yeah. Andrew: [47:14] Probably nobody. I did not watch the second season of the show, but I am assured by a diehard Frasier fan friend that it had, quote, some good episodes. Dave: [47:26] My highest stamp of approval. All right, Tara, who is your not quite winner of the week? Tara: [47:35] My not quite winner of the week is The Righteous Gemstones, which has booked Megan Mullally and Sean William Scott in guest roles for season four. Or she is playing his character's mother. And I brought this up in a crack meeting and my editor was like, oh, yeah, I forgot he was in that. I was like, he's not. He's new. The reason that you think he was already in the show is because how was he not already in the show? So I love both of these casting choices. Makes total sense. Tara: [48:01] My not quite loser of the week. I believe I talked about this lunatic either on this show or the main. But Elizabeth Finch is the Grey's Anatomy writer who was horribly disgraced for being a complete fraud in every aspect of her life. And the Peacock three-part documentary, Anatomy of Lies, was all about her. And it was the rare doc series that justified every second of its runtime because this lady, hoo boy! And she's not done because amid the fires in Los Angeles, she has been putting out a call on her social media that if people want to donate to help others who have survived the fires and, you know, need supplies and... clothes and shelter they can just go ahead and send money to her personal venmo and zell and she'll go ahead and make sure that it gets to the right people who really need it and if you give this woman money like obviously you want to be scammed and that's your problem like this is so brazen i almost respect this grift but also fuck her i can't believe she's still out here she shouldn't be allowed to have a venmo or a zell honestly but honestly tara yeah she. Dave: [49:13] Is a personality that keeps on giving. Tara: [49:15] When it comes to you like if you. Dave: [49:18] Could be a fly on the wall for all of that it would have made your century like if you had i. Tara: [49:23] Don't know let's. Dave: [49:24] Just say giant ears. Tara: [49:25] That you can listen on everybody yeah if channel four if any other platform wants to make an even longer documentary about her i will be sad like i will watch any content about her she is A fascinating freak. Dave: [49:40] Before we stop listing things, we want to make sure that everybody listening can find out where to get more Andrew Cunningham. So, Andrew, where can people find you on the Internet and the world at large? Andrew: [49:53] I do writing about technology and occasionally culture at Ars Technica. And then I am on Blue Sky these days at andrewwrites.bsky.social. I'm still not sure how we're supposed to like share these little usernames on the new not Twitters, but that's where I spend my time. Dave: [50:11] All right. Check your show notes for those links. Dave: [50:21] Welcome back, grandpas. You missed a whole bunch of content, including our discussion of Section 31, the best Star Trek thing ever. If you're interested in getting the full show every Friday, plus the bonus shows, there's a bonus show going out next week. Go to extrahotgreat.com slash club for more information and the link to join. But we're glad you're here for this. It is time for Star Trek. Would you rather? We'll start off with a section 31 inspired one. And everybody can answer this one. And it comes from Erica, who asks, would you rather be the only good person in the evil mirror universe or the only evil universe person in the goody two shoes prime universe? Sarah D. Bunting. Sarah: [51:07] Evil. Dave: [51:08] You want to be the evil one in the goody-toot-toos? Sarah: [51:10] Mm-hmm. Dave: [51:11] For what reason? Sarah: [51:12] Because being the only good one in the evil universe seems like it sucks, based on recent events of this timeline. So, let's try it the other way. Dave: [51:22] Tara? Tara: [51:23] Yes, I agree for the same reason. It seems like being the only good person in the mirror, the evil mirror universe, you're just, it's a lot of uphill climbing for no effect. hoping that one of the evil people that you run across every day doesn't just straight up murder you for fun. Dave: [51:40] Andrew, do you concur? Andrew: [51:41] Yeah, yeah, same. You've got to be the evil person in the good universe because it just seems like more fun. It seems like Georgiou in Discovery when she's horny and evil just seems like she's having a good time. And I would like to also be having a good time, please. Dave: [51:58] Rightwood asks, I'll give this to the whole group as well. Would you rather be an alien with ear shit or be an alien with forehead shit? Let's start with Andrew this time. Andrew: [52:09] Boy, probably ear shit. The forehead shit often seems to come with complicated hairdos, too. And I just don't want to be on the hook for that. So yeah, ears all the way for me. Dave: [52:21] Tara. Tara: [52:22] Yeah, I agree. I mean, this might be human normative, but I feel like having coming from a smooth forehead context, having a lot of shit on my forehead, I, you know, do I have bangs? Do I not have bangs? What can I do with makeup? It's, you know, ears. I rarely think about my ears. So having ear shit would not change my life in any material way, I think. Dave: [52:47] And Sarah, ear shit versus forehead shit. Sarah: [52:50] I come from a long line of people who already are halfway to Ferengi-ville in the ear department, so I'm going forehead shit. Dave: [52:58] Just to mix it up? Tara: [52:59] All right. Dave: [53:01] Here's one I'm going to give to Tara. Would you rather wear Jority's visor as a thong anytime you swim or go to the beach or spend five years learning sick raps and then volunteering to get assimilated into the Borg Collective to see if they will start wrapping their threats to other species? Tara: [53:22] Okay. It's only when I go to the beach. Dave: [53:26] Go to the beach or swim. So anytime you're doing your beachy swimming activity. You have to wear Geordie's visor as a thong. Tara: [53:32] That's so hard because I never want to wear a thong ever under any circumstances, never mind one that's hard plastic. But five years is a long time to learn rap, to be immersed in that. I think I got to go Geordie's visor. Sarah: [53:49] Geordie's thong? Tara: [53:50] I'm not happy about it. So good job. Those are two very unappealing options. Dave: [53:55] Okay. Here's one for Sarah D. Bunting. It comes from Gravinty. They ask, would you rather find out one of your co-workers regularly uses a holodeck program with a replica of you in it or discover a clone of yourself from 10 years ago? Sarah: [54:11] Yeah, I don't really love either of those options. How much do I know about, you know what, the clone, I guess. Hang out with yourself? Dave: [54:23] Yeah. Sarah: [54:23] Yeah, I guess. Dave: [54:25] Okay. Milsenak has one for Andrew. Would you rather explain all plots of Star Wars stuff to Data or all plots of Star Trek stuff to C-3PO? You must answer all their questions. Andrew: [54:39] I am going to say all Star Wars stuff to Data. I think the timeline is probably a little more straightforward. And Data, I don't know. I just feel like he will have all the Wikipedia stuff loaded up in his head already. where C-3PO is just gonna, he's gonna have a lot of annoying questions, I think. Dave: [54:59] Yeah, C-3PO's one. Andrew: [55:00] What annoying dude. Sarah: [55:01] Always. Dave: [55:01] Yeah. All right, let's do this for everybody. Would you rather have Khan put one of those things in your ears and you can have a week's vacation away from yourself, or have your brain simulate an entire alternate life where your big accomplishment is learning to play the penny whistle? We'll start with Andrew. Now, I know we've all seen that episode, so I'll have to answer this one. Andrew: [55:26] I would love to be good as a musical instrument, so I'm going to pick Penny Whistle. I would like to pick a better instrument, but if I can only learn the one, then so be it. Dave: [55:38] Okay. Tara? Tara: [55:40] Does it have to be that? That's the thing I learned? Dave: [55:42] The Penny Whistle? Tara: [55:43] Yes. Dave: [55:43] Yeah, that's what he learns, Picard learns after living his whole life in the... Brain simulation thing. Tara: [55:50] Yeah. I mean, it would be different if you were like, you can, you know, have this whole alternate life and then you suddenly are really good at like a step up movie franchise style dancing, which is my actual dream. But if it can't be that, I'm going to take vacation from myself. Dave: [56:05] Yeah. Tara: [56:06] Be like taking the substance, except not having a second me running around fucking shit up. Dave: [56:11] All right. So we've got one for each. Sarah, where do you land on this one? Sarah: [56:15] I mean, I don't know. The penny whistle? Like, there's not really anything you can do with that. I know it's just a simulation, but still, week's vacation for myself. Starting now. Dave: [56:28] All right. Here's another one for everybody. Would you rather discover tachyons are actually very small spiders or meet a giant spider named Tachyon? Tara: [56:38] Sarah. Sarah: [56:42] Well, meet a giant spider named Tachyon suggests. that the spider is like, I don't know, sentient and understands how I feel about them and their brethren. So I'm going to go with meet the giant spider. Dave: [56:59] Okay. Andrew? Sarah: [56:59] Then that will be over and I won't have to think about it again. Andrew: [57:03] I think, well, tachyons are probably small enough that I wouldn't have to really notice or think about how they're spiders. So I'm going to go with the tachyon spiders. Dave: [57:13] I think in the tachyon spiders universe, that thing everybody says, you swallow three spiders a day is something like, you know, you swallow 16 trillion spiders a day now. Andrew: [57:21] You are more spider than water as an organic being in this universe. Sarah: [57:25] Further than six feet from one, apparently. Dave: [57:28] All right. Tachyons are very small spiders or meet a large spider named Tachyon. Tara: [57:32] I mean, the meet one and find out its name sort of gives the con, it makes you think you're at a cocktail party and like someone is introducing you to him, like in the first Bridget Jones movie where it's being introduced to you with like helpful, interesting, details versus like meeting it on your lawn when you're taking the garbage out, which I would not care for, no, regardless of what its name is. But all of that said, I'm still going to say tachyons are tiny spiders because, yeah, it doesn't, I don't need to know everything and that, I mean, even if I did, that doesn't affect. Dave: [58:04] I would say okay here's one for andrew comes from laura who asks would you rather be marooned in the delta quadrant indefinitely far from home and everything familiar and forced to make your way home over the course of years and years and years or hang out with a holographic rat pat singer vic fontaine from deep space nine for 10 minutes uh. Andrew: [58:28] Vic fontaine seems okay i mean i'm not gonna he's he's not that bad but also the delta quadrant doesn't seem that different from the the the alpha. Dave: [58:38] Quadrant and. Andrew: [58:39] I i could have gotten home faster than they did on voyager i'm pretty confident so i'll say i'll say delta quadrant. Dave: [58:45] Because i want to speed run it imagine that you're going up to the bridge like the um jimmy fallon character from saturday night live move and they type in the computer and they're back home do you have do you have like a theory why they like do you know how to get back home faster? Andrew: [59:02] I mean, I just, there's an episode I think early on where Q comes up to Janeway and is like, hey, if we bang, I'll send you back home. And I just would have like done it. I would just have been like, okay, that sounds fine. Sarah: [59:14] Yeah. Andrew: [59:15] I, you know, I don't want to make that decision for Janeway. You know, that's, that's, you know, it's her body. It's her choice, obviously. Dave: [59:21] Principled Star Trek characters really ruined a lot of things for other Star Trek characters throughout all the series. I agree. Sarah: [59:28] Extortion is not consent. Well, true, But, you know. Andrew: [59:32] The needs of the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few or the or the one in this in this case. So I would have just taken the bullet. Dave: [59:39] All right. Here's one for everybody. Would you rather have to earnestly try to make the prefix code slang for foreplay or have Picard yell come every time you climax? Sarah: [59:54] Sarah. Prefix code. Dave: [59:59] Okay. Tara: [1:00:00] Oh, man. I mean, I do love earnestly trying to get something stupid going. I can't resist. I got to go Picard. That's so good. Dave: [1:00:13] All right. Andrew, what do you think on this one? Andrew: [1:00:15] I think prefix code, partly because I just think it's so funny that everybody's self-destruct password for the whole ship is always like password one. It's always like Kurt Alpha Alpha Destruct. That's not very secure, dude. Dave: [1:00:30] All right. Sean's got one and we'll give this one to Andrew because it deals with very niche things. Would you rather be the unsuccessful one of a pair of you after a transporter accident like the double will Thomas Rikers or become a more highly evolved you by merging with your everyday nemesis like Tuvik in a transporter accident? Andrew: [1:00:55] Uh i think less successful version of myself i you know i have the other version of me to kind of steal focus and i don't have to like i don't have to worry about living just want to go under the radar much yeah i just want to kind of live my life. Dave: [1:01:08] All right yet you didn't want a vacation from yourself earlier. Andrew: [1:01:13] Well i don't i don't the putting those things in in my ear is just like a i first watched that movie with my dad when i was like 10 or 12 or something and that scene was rough. So yeah, it's just that specific version of that prompt is designed to ick me. Dave: [1:01:33] Let's give this one to Sarah and we'll give a related one to Tara and Andrew. Sarah Millsnack asks, would you rather be a shape-shifting alien who sucks at getting noses right or become a powerful traveler, but Wesley won't leave you alone? So in Star Trek parlance, traveler is sort of a semi-omnipient time lord a la Doctor Who, I think. So, shapeshifting aliens sucks at getting noses right, or you can be a traveler, but you gotta hang out with Wesley all the time. Sarah: [1:02:05] I mean, bad noses, I think. I mean, every time I'm reintroduced to Next Generation for whatever reason, like watching him for a no-neck or whatever, it's always like, oh, Wesley, people were too hard on him, and then after 90 seconds you're like oh jesus. Dave: [1:02:22] Okay people had. Sarah: [1:02:24] It right it's not the actual fault but fuck so yeah bad noses i think. Dave: [1:02:28] Versus wesley all right well enjoy that penis nose because that's probably the first one you're going to get i just realized we have three that are sort of similar so i'll give you each one of these tara rightwood asks would you rather have andorian antennae those are the blue guys within antennae or have ferengi ears, Um, I think that's an answer. Okay. Answer, then I'll tell you what the right answer is for you. Go ahead. Tara: [1:02:53] I mean, I'm going to say antennae. I rarely wear hats. Why is that wrong? Dave: [1:02:58] Because with those giant Ferengi ears, you can listen in on conversations you couldn't before and you can learn a lot about strangers. Fight across the restaurant. Tara: [1:03:07] Oh my God. Okay. I didn't realize that they also have preternaturally good hearing with the huge ears. That does change it. You're right. you know me so well. Andrew: [1:03:17] The other thing about the huge years is they are apparently an erogenous zone for the Ferengi. So that's, you know, you can consider whether that's a pro or con based on your own personal lifestyle. It's just another thing to be aware of. Dave: [1:03:34] All right. Rightwood here for Andrew. Would you rather get pregnant by an alien and grow nipples on your forearm or impregnate your boss while you're both temporarily lizards? Andrew: [1:03:47] Uh the lizard thing i don't think they remembered doing that after well i don't know okay i'm gonna go lizards i'm going lizards okay impregnate my boss as a lizard good. Dave: [1:03:57] Choice here's one for. Andrew: [1:03:59] Everybody would. Dave: [1:04:00] You rather fuck a scottish space ghost or orgasm whenever your ship goes to warp. Andrew: [1:04:05] Sarah um. Sarah: [1:04:09] The second thing okay seems like a lot of coming and since picard is not announcing it every time. I'm fine with that. Dave: [1:04:18] Tara? Tara: [1:04:19] Oh, boy. Yeah, I agree with Sarah, although I did pick the Picard yelling option. Yeah. Dave: [1:04:28] Andrew, fuck a Scottish space ghost or orgasm when your ship goes to warp? Andrew: [1:04:33] Gonna fuck the ghost. I think orgasming for every single time you go to warp would start to feel like a curse. Dave: [1:04:44] I agree it's. Andrew: [1:04:45] Like I'm trying to go to Mars to get some milk or something like I don't need to be. Dave: [1:04:49] Get some milk I just don't need to do it every time you know I would love to see a Star Trek character the doors open to their you can be going to they just got like a carton of milk from the 20th century I don't know why that's very funny to me all right we're nearing the end here is the. Sarah: [1:05:05] Picture on the side. Dave: [1:05:08] Gravity is back let's give this one to andrew would you rather help data practice his joke telling or help jordy practice talking to women. Andrew: [1:05:21] And for the sake of the public good, I have to help Geordi become better at talking to women. My wife and I watched an episode where he had to talk to a woman the other day. He needs so much help. And these poor women also need help from him. So yeah, I'm going to try and help Geordi up his game a little bit for the good of everybody. Dave: [1:05:45] Very good. All right. Last one. This will go to everybody. It comes from Elon who asks, Would you rather attend a trombone concert, but it's all jazz, or a tin flute concert, but it's all Farah Xhaka? Sarah D. Bunty, your last opportunity here on Star Trek. Would you rather? Keep in mind, there's only one correct answer. Sarah: [1:06:08] I won't be giving it. I got to go with trombones. Dave: [1:06:11] Wow. Okay, there's somebody who hasn't watched a lot of Riker playing trombone. All right, Tara. Tara: [1:06:17] Same. You are underestimating how irritating the sound of a tin flute is, regardless of what the tune is. And if it's only one song over and over again, you'll want to kill yourself. Dave: [1:06:29] All right. Andrew, what do you think here? Andrew: [1:06:32] I'm thinking trombone also. Do you remember the episodes of 30 Rock with Jon Hamm where he was so handsome that it didn't matter that he was bad at everything? I think similar thing for Riker and trombone. He doesn't have to be good at it. Dave: [1:06:47] That's fair enough. All right. You guys have fun with that reality. I'm going to be over here in the Tin Flute concert because. Tara: [1:06:55] Dorme foo. Sarah: [1:06:56] Never again. Tara: [1:06:57] That's the you. Dave: [1:07:01] All right. Thank you, everybody. Thank you, people on Discord, for helping me out with the would you rather scenarios. Dave: [1:07:10] Well, that is it for another episode of Extra, Extra Hot Great. We follow the rainbow to the robot Vulcan leprechaun's pot of gold in Section 31 before answering your burning ass EHG questions like who on television needs a big old mustache and what's the most trivially unseen job on it. Mark got a pair of English pants in the tiny game show prize canon. We celebrated those who weren't quite the best and worst of the week and wrapped it all up with a round of Star Trek themed Would You Rather. Next up is the first of 2025's Three of These feature with Tara presenting a bookish Frasier, and she ought to know. She's Frasier. Remember. We're listening. I am David Teakle, and on behalf of the currently absent Andrew Cunningham and Tara Arianna. Tara: [1:08:02] You've made me swear now, you binge. Dave: [1:08:04] And Sarah D. Bunting. Sarah: [1:08:06] Nice to meet you, Mr. Tachyon. Dave: [1:08:08] Thanks for listening, and we'll see you next time. Right here on Extra Extra Hot Great.