Was Celebrity Bowling A Turkey?

Tara: [0:02] You're a very good bowler, though. Did you practice before this? Yes, I did. And it didn't help. And it didn't help. Dave: [0:13] This is the Extra Extra Hot Great Podcast, episode three. 394 of the week of February 7th, 2026. Tara: [0:27] Okay. Dave: [0:28] I am Dirty Finger Holes, David T. Cole, and I'm here with Reverse Hook, Sarah D. Bunting. Sarah: [0:36] Stop calling it a screwball. Dave: [0:37] And Unexpected Turkey, Tara Arellano. Tara: [0:40] No, no, no, no, no. Sarah: [0:50] Time for another Tara update. Hello. Welcome to another weekend of Extra Extra Hot Great. We're so glad you're here. If you're a new listener to our extra show, welcome. If you're not, you still might need reminding that your support of this podcast entitles you to forcing us to watch stuff. That means just what it sounds like. You give us TV, good or bad, we have to watch it and talk about it. This month, we have selected an episode of Celebrity Bowling featuring four out of the six Brady Bunch kids and Steve Sanders' dad. If you want to nominate an episode or other television artifact, you can do that at our website. That's extrahotgreat.com slash club for more information on how to do that. But for now, let us get into this episode and why listener Beth submitted it. Beth wrote, this is an amazing time capsule of what used to be considered entertaining. The show itself is kind of boring, but the production is fascinating. The fashion, graphics, the set, the tiny audience, the rando commentators coaching them, the single microphone available for post-game chit-chat, and the disturbing lack of foundation garments. Yikes. Sarah: [2:05] So glad Beth brought all of these things up. Both Eve Plum and Maureen McCormick were seriously boobing around the lanes, but let's back up a sec. Celebrity Bowling aired sort of intermittently throughout the 70s, hosted by Jed Allen, aka Rush Sanders from Beverly Hills 90210 and many other soapy properties. It was also color commentated on occasion by actual pro bowlers. It pitted various Famosos against each other in classic 10-pin bowling. I was sort of surprised looking at the IMDB at the big shots they got. This didn't seem like the kind of thing Sammy Davis Jr. would do, but was. Tara: [2:47] Or Bob Newhart, who is in the thumbnail on Prime, like of all people, really? Sarah: [2:52] Wow. Tara: [2:52] All right. Dave: [2:53] Did Sammy Davis Jr. always make it like a right-side gutter ball? Sarah: [2:58] Presumably he knows how to account for for that this episode ostensibly aired may 1st 1975 but it has to have been filmed much earlier based on the end of show chatter about the actors ages and i think in their universe the show hadn't been canceled yet yeah which had happened in 74 so who knows when they actually filmed this or when it really aired it was a syndicated show So this is the four Brady kids split into two teams and pitted against each other. Marsha and Greg, Maureen McCormick and Barry Williams, versus Eve, Jan, Plum, and Christopher Peter Knight, a Southpaw for whom I had high hopes, but hope nobody else was betting on this. Let's do the gen check-in. Should our listeners watch this episode of Celebrity Bowling? David T. Cole. Tara: [3:48] Not great, Bob. Sarah: [3:51] Tara. Tara: [3:51] I agree with Beth that it's fascinating as an exercise in what used to pass for acceptable programming on television. But yeah, it's really bad. Yeah. Decide for yourself based on that. Sarah: [4:05] I would say, sure. If you're like a Brady Bunch ephemera completist, it's not made very well, but in some ways it's also instructive. We'll get into it. I'll do a quick episode overview for what it's worth, but there's just not that much to view over. Dave: [4:22] Bowling. Tara: [4:22] No, people bowl. Sarah: [4:23] The actors bowl. They're trying to win prizes for audience members. Jed Allen and today's pro bowler color lady, Cheryl Kaminsky, provide some commentary. Carrie, Cheryl does not do a great job, or really any job at all, of explaining how this is going to be scored. Clip two. Let's say, simply, best ball is the count, the best. Tara: [4:57] Spare for either of them. Let's watch and see. All right, tell me the first. Sarah: [5:02] Okay yeah watching and seeing does actually clarify how the game works basically whoever ends the first bowl with the better lie the other player has to like clean up that frame unless it's a strike but like trying to explain it in words which cheryl clearly did not write down beforehand, doesn't really work plus side opportunities for that's what she said our legion clip three i think I think one thing to stress about. Tara: [5:32] Women bowlers is their hand release. They have to be firm on the shot. A little bit of a reverse on that, not much. Yeah. Gotta keep the fingers firm on the ball. Sarah: [5:44] That's what he said i found this episode surprisingly quiet for lack of a better term not just that nobody was really miked properly at all yeah but that the production didn't feel the need to fill every second with commentary or graphics like if you side by side this with the equivalent today or any like game show it just felt very straightforward and public access Did you guys notice this? And how did you feel that it's stacked up in terms of gameplay and dead air ratios, Tara? Tara: [6:20] It's crazy that they're not Mike. The fact that you don't get to hear the celebrity bowlers react to whatever they're doing. It's like, OK, what is the point of them being celebrities? They could be just anybody for how much interest they're bringing to this. Like presumably the idea is it'll be fun to see these famous people like goofing around and then all you get in terms of reaction is what you can see, which unfortunately, as Beth also alluded to, is a lot of jumping up and down for the braless ladies, which is ill-advised. You're still rooting for them. It's still a game. There's still that weird thing of bowling where you know it's dumb, but you want to do well. And I thought it was sort of endearing how you can see that on the faces of the celebrities, too. But I just would have liked to hear more from them. Sarah: [7:12] Yeah. Tara: [7:12] So as a piece of entertainment, it's like very ill-conceived, I would say. Sarah: [7:19] Even the booth, so to say, isn't mic'd up. Like Jed Allen is like, he's in Carrots-ing in the background. We have no idea what he's actually saying. I did respect that it was pretty straightforward. It's just like, they're going to bowl and then we'll see what happens. In the middle, we'll talk about the prizes and then we're going to bowl some more. And then we'll see what crappy stuff people won. did we at least respect that pacing or was it just like, this is boring? Dave: [7:45] No, it's terrible. I don't know where you're coming from on that one. This seems like it was filmed by a guy that the week before brought the first video camera in the county to the bowling alley and filmed it there and thought, oh, this could be a TV show, but I need to get some people that people want to watch because bowling's not enough. And that's what he did. I didn't know about micing people. They only had one wired mic for the rest of the staff so the host and the color commentarist were sharing a mic but we're not good at sharing the mic no he didn't he didn't do that news thing where it's like and now here on the scene and then he passes it over to the other person to talk he didn't do that then so there's a lot of blah blah blah blah. Dave: [8:29] And the only time you could hear the Brady Bunch people was if they shouted so loud, it was picked up by that mic. And they are 10 feet away, probably. So it doesn't happen that much. And when it does... So it was just a nightmare from the production side of things. And if you're going to call your show Celebrity Bowling, how about, I don't know, let's hear something from the celebrities. Because we're just watching them bowl. And let's face it, celebrities are too busy for bowling. they're not going to bowl very well. There's two strikes in the whole half hour. So even the bowling was boring. It was just a very weird combo. The one show like this that I was obsessed with with a child was the very close but non-celebrity version Bowling for Dollars, which was just local people bowling. And I think they also played for somebody else by mail or something like that. And that was great. I just wanted to see good bowling, not a gutter ball every other shot. So it was kind of a complete fail, but fascinating from a how did this get made standpoint. Totally. Sarah: [9:36] Yeah. Tara: [9:36] I also thought it was really funny every time Cheryl would be like, you know, you could get better if you practice more, which like, yeah, that's true of anything. That's true of any enterprises. It's not a lot of great bowling insight. Dave: [9:49] Yeah. You really should come to our meet. You might like crocheting. Sarah: [9:52] There's a lot of youth bowling leagues. It's like, it's Barry Williams. Tara: [9:57] Yeah. He has a job. He's busy. He's not joining a youth bowling league. Dave: [10:03] The Variety newspaper spins towards the camera. Pretty much in turmoil as lead kid goes to the professional bowling circuit. Tara: [10:12] To go back to the prizes, though, the ones that they won were crappy because they are not good bowlers because they haven't joined a youth league. But at the high end, if there were three turkeys in the game, which is like so unlikely, which I assume is why this is the top prize. But the top prize was a four week vacation in Mexico. Sarah: [10:33] Yeah. All over Mexico. It was like one week at each place. Tara: [10:37] Yes. Dave: [10:37] Pre-kidnap and tongue removal, Mexico, too. Sarah: [10:40] Mm-hmm. Yeah. I mean, of course, it's shot like beautiful Mount Airy Lodge, which is like, oh, is everything green? Tara: [10:48] Cool. Sarah: [10:49] That was, I think, my favorite part was bringing you back to the time when the floor of game prizing was really a floor. And, you know, glad to see Rice-A-Roney holding down the thank you for playing spot as usual. So good. Those fonts. Did anyone have any expectations as to which Brady's would. Sarah: [11:11] Bowl well and which would not? Or who might be starting to take it seriously halfway through the game and be kind of bitter that they weren't bowling all that well, Barry Williams? I thought that was super relatable. Tara: [11:24] I did think that was cute. I didn't think that Eve would be the best bowler. So she impressed me. Sarah: [11:29] Yeah. And without a bra on. No less. She's like the smallest one and had a lot of interference happening at the elbow level and she still killed it. Tara: [11:42] Mm-hmm. Sarah: [11:42] It was amazing also how quickly you even watching get back into the body language of it, like yes, turning your whole torso to try to English the ball off the lip of the of the gutter. But this really was public access. I am shocked that this was syndicated. I guess things happen and you have to have some celebrity bowling in your in your back pocket. Do you think they should bring this show back dave. Dave: [12:08] No no. Tara: [12:10] Not even with two weeks. Dave: [12:11] No just like what are you gonna do the jazz it up celebrity spectacle has moved so far away from i gotta show up and bowl a few frames that you just can't do this right now it'd have to be like bowling but if you miss somebody like kidnaps you and then you have to figure out way back to the alley or something like that yeah it has to be a lot more now i gotta say though this is the first time in a while i've seen people bowling that I haven't been like, I should go bowling. This actually made me want to not go bowling. It was so boring and tedious. Sarah: [12:40] Cut to Dave burning down a bowling alley later this afternoon. Sorry, Austin area. Dave: [12:46] RIP Highland Lanes. Sarah: [12:48] What about you, Tara? Tara: [12:49] I think there's an opportunity for a, let's say, bowling moly if they've tried to make it wackier, not necessarily with celebrities, but just make the game more... Dave: [12:59] Gutterballs! Sarah: [13:02] Yeah. Dave: [13:03] With? Sarah: [13:04] Well, that was my next question. Who hosts this? Dave: [13:07] Who hosts Gutterballs, Tar? Sarah: [13:09] Werner Herzog. Tara: [13:10] Who does host Gutterballs? I forget. Dave: [13:12] Gutterballs isn't a real show. Tara: [13:14] Oh. Oh! Sorry! I thought you were making a reference to something. Dave: [13:17] This is Bully Moly. We're rebranding Bully Moly. It's called Gutterballs now. Sarah: [13:21] No, I think we gotta stick with Bully Moly, but whatever is decided. Dave: [13:25] I don't need. Tara: [13:26] Steph curry on my ass that's fair enough i mean the ms is pretty busy but that does seem like his speed perhaps who's a comic who's like john goodman, Oh, yeah. John Goodman. Good choice. Dave: [13:42] John Goodman and a hologram of Howard Cosell. Tara: [13:47] Perfect. Oh, this may not have made us want to bowl. It did make me want to buy a celebrity bowling hoodie. And I did. So look out for that. Future tapings. Sarah: [13:56] You did. Oh, boy. Dave: [14:06] Well, here we are at Ask EHG, the theme that always bowls strikes. We'll be right back. Oh, those pins getting hit by a bowling ball. All right, it is time for Ask EHG, which means it is time first for Ask, Ask EHG. Let's see who our judge is going to be. Let's spin our new wheel. That doesn't sound like a wheel. Tara's the judge. Tara: [14:50] Hi. Our question from last week was, if someone from 15th century London turned up at your house, How would you explain TV to them? This is a question from Seekent. And I have a couple of runners up. Lara suggested, Hail, this is a TV. It is as a magic, with a K, Windu that shooeth thee tales, both feigned and sooth. Sarah: [15:15] Ooh, that's good. Tara: [15:17] LT went on at some length, but I feel it's important to hear it all. LT writes, I'm not going to explain it. My goal is to get them addicted to TV without having a meltdown so that they then understand the importance of TV through experience. So first, I would turn on one of those dog-slash-cat TV shows of squirrels or mice frolicking in a field or whatever and let them believe it was a window. Let them get addicted and then introduce them to nature shows and maybe that nine-hour Norwegian train ride show on mute. After gently introducing them to the magical nature window, we can start educating them about Britain with familiar scenery, so clearly our next shows are Kunk on Britain and then Kunk on Earth. Next, something King Arthur related, perhaps the likely terrible but only King Arthur show I remember, the Merlin miniseries from the late 90s. This is Merlin the TV series erasure. After we were good on familiar things, they'll probably be ready for a TV show about TV like 30 Rock, LOL. But our winner is Dan Casino, who writes, Of course, my 15th century friend would know about the 13th century St. Clair of Assisi, so I could simply recount the tale of how the patron saint of television couldn't attend mass so she was able to view it projected on the wall of her cell. It's like that, except you can also see things that happened in the past. Also, as a good Catholic boy, it's important to know who to pray to when the cable is out. Very true. Thank you, Dan. Sarah: [16:42] Uh-huh. Tara: [16:42] Hit up Dave on the Discord DMs to get your stickers. Dave: [16:47] All right. Thank you, Dan. Thank you, Tara. Let's get into your questions for us this week. First one comes from Diatho. Wishbone is doing TV pilots. What shows should be covered? Who will Wishbone play? Tara. Tara: [16:59] It's going to be Pluribus. Wishbone is playing Carol because I want to see that doggy on a couch cocking his head at the Deputy Secretary of Agriculture, addressing him directly through the TV. Sarah. Sarah: [17:12] The West Wing. Wishbone plays Donna. Spends a lot of time trotting after Josh. Typecasting, honestly. Dave. Dave: [17:19] He's in Lost. He plays Gary Troop. He's the guy in the pilot that gets sucked into a jet engine. Sarah: [17:26] Oh, dear. Dave: [17:27] Poor Wishbone. Joe Hill Gent. What show would actually benefit from Netflix's rule about characters explaining the plot for second screeners? Sarah. Sarah: [17:38] With the understanding that I would always rather know less or be confused. than be sitting through a pop-up video audio tutorial I don't need. The idea of running Twin Peaks through the Netflix domometer kind of makes me smile just because I would like to have seen what Lynch and company would have done with the mandate and how they would have subverted that. So that is my answer. Dave. Dave: [18:01] What do you got there, Agent Cooper? It's pie and coffee again. My answer is anything from Westeros. and for me there's always two characters who confer with each other anytime there's three or more characters on screen what kingdom they call home who they like who likes who they also give them nicknames they say along with their real names all the time like oh that's sir old mutton chops sir biggity doom of house earfold or whatever it is so that i get the real name but i also get a nickname, which of course I will use because I cannot remember anybody's real name from that show. Tara: [18:39] Maybe something like Mr. Robot would benefit from big glowing arrows and like boi-oi-oing sound effects to cue you when what's happening on screen isn't actually real to anyone except the lead character. Sarah: [18:52] Now I want that. Boi-oi-oing. Tara: [18:55] Boi-oi-oing. Dave: [18:57] Next question is from Deca Brist. What would be your submissions for what I call a Mega Cannon? A run of a few episodes of a series that are not a two-parter, but are so good together, it's hard to pick just one of them as the best. I can always pick one that's better. It's not a problem for me. That's my superpower. I mean, there's lots of things that you're talking about that I can see. Like, even if they're all super duper, there's always great better best in those. So like, and or end of season one, it ends with three really good episodes, but I'm happy to make a confident call on that one. So, which is one way out. So it's not a problem for me. Tara: [19:40] The end of Brooklyn Nine-Nine season four and the start of season five are all about Dino. Jake and Rosa trying to take down a corrupt cop played by Gina Gershon, and then they end up getting framed for her crimes and they go to prison themselves. And when we were rewatching these episodes, I kept trying to decide which one we should cover on again with again with this because Gina Gershon was a guest star on Melrose Place. But there's no way to separate one in a way that would have been satisfying. I thought, although I guess I should have just asked Dave. Dave: [20:09] Yeah, let me know. Okay. I'll pick one for you. Tara: [20:12] Sarah. Sarah: [20:13] I disagree with Dave. I think this is an interesting question. The ones that sprang to mind for me are Buffy, middle of season two, Surprise, Innocence, and Phases. The first two are Buffy doing it with Angel. He becomes Angelus and it's all fucking bad. And then Phases is a nice palate cleansing Oz goes werewolf episode. But the fact that they're together, so you got a break from the super intense imagery of the first two is good. Really, my answer, though, is the Law & Order Los Angeles Troika from Season 7. That's Episodes 15 through 17. But I kind of feel like that's generally received as one Megasode already. So, but yeah, I mean, I think that's an interesting idea in terms of like, if you're submitting something for the canon, but you know that an episode is hard to tease out of a run like that. Interesting question. Thank you. Dave: [21:05] Interesting question on something we will not be doing, just so let's make that clear. We are not watching three hours of TV to decide on a Mega Cannon. Tara: [21:13] No. Dave: [21:14] Milsnack, which non-kids TV show should have a live touring on ice version of a TV show? Tara. Tara: [21:22] You want something that has action, romance, and music, and that is, of course, Empire. Dave? Dave: [21:28] You want something with sexism and drinking, of course, that is Mad Men. Tara: [21:32] Sarah? Sarah: [21:33] Oh, I love that one. Craziest Girlfriend I went with seemed like a natural evolution. Dave: [21:39] Great thing about the Mad Men on Ice is the penultimate number about Burt Cooper's octopus sex scene. Yep. It's weird, but they make it work. Vandy. Oh, God. If you punched a hole in the center of an English muffin or a biscuit, is that baked good now a bagel? Sarah. Sarah: [22:00] Bandy. Trying to get her ass kicked. No, bagels are boiled. Muffins and biscuits are baked. Also, bialis. Do not make a biali. Put a hole in it, bake it, and tell me it's a bagel. Taint. Tara. Tara: [22:13] Yeah, no, it's not a donut either. It's also not a vinyl single, because that also has a hole in the middle. It's a lot of things it's not. Dave: [22:22] Yeah. Sarah: [22:23] Dave. Dave: [22:23] Yeah, you can't cut it like a star and say it's like, you know, one of those throwing stars from ninja movies either. It's just, Bread doesn't work that way. Neither do bagels. L Triple B with a Masked Singer set to return. Any predictions on who will be contestants? Who was the disgraced Chicago guy from like 10 years ago? Tara: [22:42] Rod Blagojevich. Dave: [22:43] Yes. Tara: [22:43] He did Dancing with the Stars already. Dave: [22:45] I know. That's where I'm getting at. Tara: [22:47] I see. Dave: [22:47] Jeez. All right. Well, that but Maitrey Taylor Greene. Tara: [22:52] Next time. Mm-hmm. Dave: [22:54] All right. Sarah: [22:54] Oh, yeah. Dave: [22:55] Well, that was fun. Sarah. Sarah: [22:58] I don't know who's left. There's been like 200 contestants already. Bonaduce, Will Wheaton, Geraldo. I feel like that's about the level, but also I watched like 1.5 episodes and don't understand why it's still Marie Celestine along, so I'm the wrong one to ask, Tara. Tara: [23:17] Yeah, this is a show that has had Sarah Palin, Rudy Giuliani, and the Grizzlies as contestants, So I feel like there's no possible way I could guess where those producers' depravity will point them next. I actually think Marjorie Taylor Greene is a pretty good guess. Sarah: [23:32] I agree. Tara: [23:34] A Mormon wife is my other thought. Sarah: [23:37] Sure. Yeah, just post up outside of Leavenworth and see who's leaving that day. And in two weeks, they'll be on The Masked Singer. Tara: [23:43] Mm-hmm. Dave: [23:44] Diana is next. You answered my question about breadstrat. Oh, that was the loaf. That was the stump up the loaf question. Yes. Sarah: [23:51] Oh, right. Dave: [23:52] Now I'm going to ask you about butterstrat. Do you keep it in the fridge, on the counter, or a secret third place like Starbucks? Tara? Tara: [24:02] We get spreadable butter in a tub and it lives in the fridge. Sarah? Sarah: [24:08] I am related by marriage to one of those counter weirdos, but I can't with that. And also cats will find a way to lick it. It doesn't matter what kind of cover is on it. So fridge, I'm not an animal. Dave: [24:20] Yeah. Fridge, like Tara said, whatever we get is basically half butter, half margarine. So it always spreads. You don't have to worry about that. There is no end to cut off because it is in a tub. I'm a strict obeyer of the sell by date, the expiry date on things. So I would never put butter on the counter like that. It will just throw off the math and you would die from butter alia or whatever you get when you have bad butter. All right. A related question from Laffer, L-A-F-R. Never did find out how I'm supposed to pronounce that. Butterstrap continued. Do you slice off a pat from the end of your stick of butter, or are you a monster who takes a layer off the top? Sarah. Sarah: [25:01] Uh and and also i don't think that's monstrous i think that's like evidence of a neurological disorder or growth that's happening why would you do that follow-up question for you though laugher straight slice off the end or angle to get a little triangle the. Dave: [25:20] Reason you don't take it off the end is because if you scrape it off the top you get a more spreadable knife full and that way you're not like, oh, my toast is now curled up into the butter and I have a big hole in my now bagel. So I'm a definite top scraper. Sarah: [25:38] Just cut a thinner slice? Dave: [25:39] Yeah, it's called off the top. Sarah: [25:41] Are your hands asleep? Dave: [25:42] What's the problem with cutting it off the top? Scraping it off the top? Sarah: [25:46] Slicing it from the top is weird to me no. Tara: [25:50] No you just like spread take a take a swipe you're like you're an archaeologist. Sarah: [25:54] Going through that's not how the question was phrased so i forgive me if you're just sort of like peeling up a little curl from the top yeah okay i guess but i don't know grow up cut it off the end no. Dave: [26:05] Don't grow up don't lose your sense of wonder and innocence people by cutting off a pat of butter from the side. Sarah: [26:12] What butter wonder killer okay I would. Tara: [26:16] Also do scrape off the top if we were a stick family but we're not we only buy stick butter for cooking so in that case we cut it off the end enough, I'm so sick and tired of hearing. Dave: [26:27] You people talk about food, food, food. Diatho will bookend our questions. MySpace is back. No exclamation point. MySpace is back. Which TV characters are in your top five? All right. I'm going to assume this is just like the phone plans of the late 90s. Sarah: [26:44] Yeah. Dave: [26:44] I'm going to go with Mike Ehrmantraut. Low frequency contact person, but helps me destroy my homeowners association when I need help. Very handy. Malcolm Tucker from The Thick of It for the quality text-based insults that I will receive. Always entertaining. Templeton Face Peck, a man who is good to know for getting those hard-to-acquire items that you need. Joan Holloway for reasons. And that's only four, not five. So I'll think of the fifth when we circle back to me after we hear from Tara. Tara: [27:17] Okay. My list was people I want to hear more from. I want to be aware of their feeds. So I've got Liz Lemon from 30 Rock, Bill McNeil from NewsRadio, Artie from The Larry Sanders Show, Titus Andromedon from Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt. And of course, because I need to keep tabs on it, The Dome from Under the Dome. Sarah. Sarah: [27:38] The eponymous Veronica Mars. Dorothy Zbornak from Golden Girls. Lenny Briscoe from Law & Order. Pauly Walnuts from The Sopranos, because I want to know what's going on in the neighborhood. And Niles Green from Frasier. Dave, back to you. Dave: [27:52] Donut Head Homer. Beez or Laura has your Ask Ask EHG question. It is, what's a great moment from an otherwise awful TV character? Got a candidate? Want to make a short case for it? Go to our Discord. Ask Ask EHG is the channel where you want to plop your answers. And if you are not on Discord and you don't want to be in Discord, you're like, Discord? Never. you can email me at david at cole dot fyi provide your answer there and i will add it to the hopper, Dave: [28:25] It had to be said, the Oregon State Highway Division not only had a whale of a. Dave: [28:37] Dead on arrival on the beach near Florence? This is a pitch for the tiny local reporting cannon. So if a whole bunch of neurons just fired in the pleasure center of your brain on hearing that clip, then you too may have lived in the time before the internet. when you first came across this 1970 Oregon news report at, let's say, a fringe movie festival or an 8th Gen videotape of weird shit you got at a junk shop on the Lower East Side. These are the only ways you can see this kind of stuff back in the day. If you are not one of those people, you may be wondering why a dead beached whale news report could elicit such a reaction. Well, first, here's the pledge. It had been so long since a whale had washed up in Lane County, nobody could remember how to get. Tara: [29:34] Might soon be uncovered. It couldn't be cut up and then buried because nobody wanted to cut it up, and it couldn't be burned. So dynamite it was. Dave: [29:41] Some 20 cases or a half ton of it. Okay, now the turn. About 75 bystanders, most of them residents who had first found the. Tara: [29:50] Whale to be an object of curiosity before they tired of its smell, were moved back a quarter of a mile away. The sand dunes there were covered with spectators and landlubber. Sarah: [30:00] Newsmen shortly to become land blubber newsmen, with a blasted blubber beyond all believable bounds. Dave: [30:08] It's a whale. It's an attraction. It's going to blow up. It's a whale. It's an attraction. It's going to blow up. Are you getting it? And now, the prestige. Tara: [30:23] Did you get a worm? Did you get a worm? There you go. Good? Good. Hey, look at this. Oh! Oh! All right, Fred, you. Sarah: [30:40] Can take your hands out of your head. Here comes the cases of... Our cameras stopped rolling immediately after the blast. The humor of the entire situation suddenly gave way to a run for survival as huge chunks of whale blubber fell everywhere. Pieces of meat passed high over our heads while others were falling at our feet. The dunes were rapidly evacuated. Dave: [31:17] However everyone on the scene was covered with small particles of dead whale. Dave: [31:22] And there you have the exploding whale from the Oregon Coast News Report. Something that lived in legend. It almost was an urban legend in our school. But seeing in reality was better than in your mind because you're so used on the news to only hearing about things and not actually seeing it. But this was something that was planned. So they parked their camera and they were filming it. And you see the explosion and the giant cloud of red mist. And then like when Jabba's skiff blows up in Return of the Jedi and all the things go in the sand towards the camera, that same fucking thing happens. It might have been what George Lucas based that scene on, frankly. Dave: [32:04] And then there's it's really like, oh, these people are going to be covered in giblets. Here comes the whale bits. And sure enough, that's what happened, including like a giant, like a gym bag size piece of whale that just landed on top of a car. Like somebody always commits suicide off of a hotel balcony and lands on the car. It looked exactly like that. So there's just a lot of great things happening. And when you first discover this at, I'm going to say between the ages of five and 12, it will stick in your memory forever. This is one of the greatest moments of my childhood when I finally saw this. And it still brings me joy. So thank you, Dead Whale. Thank you, KATU Channel 2, for this piece of television history. Who wants to go first to talk about this? Tara: [32:55] I'll go first. Thank you, Dave, for bringing this to us. I hadn't actually watched it before. I had only heard tell. I thought it was going to be something more recent. I didn't realize how this has lived in legend for decades. Sarah: [33:08] Pre-DB Cooper. Dave: [33:09] Yeah, if you watch it, it kind of has the patina of a corporate video of the era. You know, like the future is today. Sarah: [33:17] Yeah, or like a bomb test. Yeah. Tara: [33:20] It's so much more deadpan than I would expect for something like this. If this were on the news tomorrow, it would be the last story of the day. It would be like kooky, funny story. Then the cut back to the anchor's chuck. This is quite serious. I mean, he gets in some puns. Land lubbers turned land blubber and the alliteration with all the bees that we heard. But when you see that fucking crushed car, someone could have died. It's clear. They did not think this through. Dave: [33:51] Yeah. Tara: [33:51] No one had any sense of how this was actually going to go, obviously, or they would have like cordoned off the parking lot, like made a bigger blast radius, no go zone, but they didn't. I would love to know if the person who owned that car sued the city because I assume they did. Sarah: [34:07] Yeah. Is that force majeure? How does that? Are you insured for that? Tara: [34:12] Right. Dave: [34:13] Or was it just a fluke? Sarah: [34:15] Oh. Tara: [34:18] Anyway, that's life. You try to just blow up your problems and hope that crabs and seagulls will clean up what's left. And then you find out the debris and the smell travels much further than you could imagine. Dave: [34:32] But the real genius of all this, the real part of all this happens before the newscast where all these guys get around to tables. How are we going to figure this out? And one guy's like, how about dynamite? And they're like, yeah, all right. 20 cases of dynamite. Let's do it. Tara: [34:49] Yeah, we need a drunk history of this. Dave: [34:52] Seriously. I think it kind of was. Tara: [34:53] Well, yeah, that's a good point. Sarah: [34:56] Sarah. I think we already saw it. The deadpan delivery, the this sounded like a good idea at the time thing. That's like it just brings to mind so many stories of battles that went horribly wrong. Towards the end of the Civil War, Union forces dug underneath the Confederate lines and packed it with dynamite, and they blew this huge crater into the Confederate earthworks and then ran down into the hole, but they didn't bring ladders, so they couldn't get up. And the Confederates just fired down into the pit. It was a complete slaughter. Nobody thought it through. And this reminded me of that and the WKRP turkey drop. But, I mean, I think the beauty of it is that, like, this narrator is, like, turned into a run for survival. And then you see this car. I mean, cars were fucking tanks back then. They weighed over a ton. And it was just stepped on like it was a toy. Tara: [35:55] Like, yeah, like a pop can. Mm-hmm. Sarah: [35:58] And then you cut back to the bulldozers like there is a not insignificant percentage of the carcass that was completely unmoved still by the rotting blubber bomb aerosolization process. And even the seagulls are like, nah, just like went to Tacoma like, all right, fair. Dave: [36:19] When the bulldozer is actually moving it in the footage, like you see all the gooey viscera spilling out of the side that's open. And I'm like, wow, I wouldn't have thought that would make it to air. But here we are. Tara: [36:30] Yep. A different time. I like stinking. Sarah: [36:36] I mean, it's a legend for a reason. Thank you for bringing this to us. Dave: [36:40] All right. Well, let's put this to the official vote, Tara Arrieta. Tara: [36:43] Of course. Dave: [36:44] Serti, buddy. Sarah: [36:45] Absolutely. Dave: [36:46] All right. So, exploding whale from the news. You are hereby inducted into the extra-hot, great, tiny, local reporting cannon. It might be concluded that should a whale ever wash ashore in Lane County again. Tara: [37:01] Those in charge will not only remember what to do, Tara: [37:04] They'll certainly remember what not to do. Americans love a winner. Yep. Dave: [37:10] And will not tolerate a loser. Nope. Well, it's time for Not Quite Winners and Losers of the Week. I will go first. Here's my Not Quite Winner of the Week. It is Kumail Nanjiani. He is going to be starring or perhaps just being in, it's unclear, a series adaptation of the comic book Sex Criminals. And that's going to be at Amazon. on. This is something that I pitched to EHG years ago as an adaptation. The lead character discovers she can stop time when she orgasms, which is neat. But then she meets a guy that can also stop time when he orgasms. So they orgasm together and stop time together, and then they get bored and start robbing banks. And then it kind of goes from there. We're dealing with secret societies and all this weird shit like that as the comic book goes on. Comic book, definitely like an R. sort of thing. And I can't tell from the article, they don't say whether this is live action or it's going to be like a cartoon, not a cartoon, but an animation production. I'm going to assume it's live action. So it's going to be a little weird to shoot, but you know, it's weird. It's goofy, but there's also a love-ish story in it too. It's a really well-regarded comic book and it's a lot of fun. So I'm interested to see where they go with it. I guess we'll check it out in a couple of years. Sarah: [38:28] I wonder what that audition process was like. Dave: [38:31] Seriously. Sarah: [38:31] If it is live action, eyebrow. Tara: [38:34] Right. Dave: [38:34] A lot of people just freezing. Sarah: [38:37] No sides, only Luperderm. Tara: [38:40] The co-creator is Emily V. Gordon, who is Kumail Nanjiani's wife and writing partner. So, you know, I imagine he probably had a leg up there. Sarah: [38:48] Okay. Question answered. Thank you. Dave: [38:49] What other weird meet cute stories can we bring to the screen, say they? Tara: [38:52] But the other co-creator is Zee Chun. And not to say that people who started an animation or even mostly work in it can't do live action, but his last show was the Gremlins animated series. Dave: [39:04] I looked up the production company, Lucky Chap. I think. And they have a mix of animated and live action. So I couldn't tell from that either what direction they may go. It would be better animated, I think. But, you know, whatever. Not quite loser of the week. It's Mr. Rogers and Neighborhood getting a steam song covered by Lady Gaga for a commercial during the Super Bowl. And let me just say, simply, there are some things you shouldn't cover. Some things that are sacrosanct. And that seems like one of them. You know, a beloved modern saint sort of character. You just don't mess with it, especially for commercial reasons. Tara: [39:40] Right. Especially like a beloved PBS public broadcasting show to being used to sell fucking real estate apps. Boo. Dave: [39:49] Yeah. Boo indeed. Sarah. Sarah: [39:51] My not quite winner is the original Real Housewives of New York cast members who have relocated like almost entire to star in a new e-reality show that's set in Palm Beach. I don't think any of these people is good or deserves more attention or sort of funding from the reality industrial complex, but people who were fans of Real Housewives, this is an iconic set of monsters. So I think E! has chosen wisely. Like, even if the people are losers, the production is guaranteed to make money, probably. My not-quite-loser is Tyra Banks, former America's Next Top Model contestant Lisa D'Amato, who loves to talk shit, and we revere this about her, has accused Tyra of hiding the fact that she, Tyra, is a producer on the upcoming Netflix documentary series about the show, which, yeah, I was kind of excited about that series, and now, so I felt too. As a producer, it's like the Charlie Sheen. I mean, it wasn't a conundrum. Fuck that guy. Tara: [41:01] Yeah. Sarah: [41:02] Tara. Tara: [41:02] My not quite winner of the week is Joshua Jackson and by extension, all still bereft fans of Dr. Odyssey who miss seeing him every week because he has been cast in an HBO Max family drama pilot called How to Survive Without Me, which also stars Ray Romano. He was just cast this week as well, but you know, he'll be fine. I think it's more important to talk about Joshua Jackson. the former Doctor Odyssey. Sarah: [41:27] One of them was in Dr. Fuckboat. The other one is Ray Romano. Tara: [41:30] That's right. Sarah: [41:31] Priorities in order. Dave: [41:32] Fuckboat. Tara: [41:35] Our not quite loser of the week, or mine rather, is Timothee Chalamet, who has claimed that when he hosted Saturday Night Live last January in the run-up to the Oscars, where he ended up getting nominated for the Bob Dylan movie, A Complete Unknown. I forgot what it was called for a second because I never saw it because I don't care. But anyway, he spent over six figures out of his own pocket to be the musical guest on that episode as well and sing three Bob Dylan songs because he wanted to do it and suggested it. And Lorne Michaels was like, no. And he was like, well, what if I paid for this? And then he was like, all right. And that's why he still has this job in season 51, I guess, extorting money from vain stars who just want to fuck around as fake artists. Dave: [42:24] Famous visual medium of podcasting but what do you guys think of this shirt idea. Tara: [42:31] It's pretty good. Dave: [42:32] It's a whale in two pieces with a dead eye thing going on over the top it says all right fred i took. Tara: [42:40] A screenshot we can put it in the uh in the show notes. Dave: [42:42] Yeah all right well let me know if you're interested in an all right fred shirt and. Tara: [42:47] We welcome in our grandpas for the extra credit segment. Remember, grandpas, you can get the full episode in which we talked about the Bradys on celebrity bowling, more food talk, we got into bagels and butter, multiple butter questions. We talked about a legendary local news explosion. It's very exciting. So go to extrahotgreat.com slash club to find out how you can kick up that pledge and get the full episodes that you will then be entitled to. But for now, you get this. My extra credit topic is called Who Can Do It All? Though who occupies which strata of fame is constantly in flux, which stars can fulfill certain positions is probably fixed in our minds. Tara: [43:43] The challenge today for co-hosts is to come up with the one person that you think could credibly do all of the following. host the Muppet Show, host Saturday Night Live, guest host Jimmy Kimmel live, cameo as themselves in the studio, present at the Oscars, and endorse a mobile game that apparently makes more money than you would have ever imagined such that they could get like Drew Barrymore or Courtney Cox and Lisa Kudrow and whoever else in their commercials and ask, please don't pick anyone who's already done any of the above other than the Oscars because that's too hard to research and to be prepared to defend your choice in each of these gigs. This is sort of the spiritual sequel to an extra credit I thought of years ago at this point of like, who's the most famous person who could be in an old Navy commercial and who's the least famous person we think could probably do it. This has already, I'm going to say, divided our household. Dave did a lot of complaining about this last night. Yeah. Dave: [44:45] Well, because every time I came up with somebody that seemed good, I would research it. Like, has Keanu Reeves, he hasn't done anything else, has he presented at the Oscars? Yes, he fucking presented at the Oscars. Out. Tara: [44:56] I said exception the Oscars. Dave: [44:57] Well, then why is it in the list? Tara: [44:59] Exception that it's okay if they've done that before. Dave: [45:02] Well, why is Oscars in the list at all? Sarah: [45:04] Keanu is my answer, so do you guys want to keep fighting? Yeah, I do want to keep fighting. Dave: [45:08] Why is Oscars in the list if we're allowed to ignore it? Tara: [45:13] Because it was too hard to find it out with a quick Google, I thought. Dave: [45:17] It was very easy to find out. Tara: [45:18] All right. Dave: [45:19] To my dismay at that. And then I would think, oh, maybe Glenn Powell. No, he was hosting a Saturday Night Live. I went through like 10 of these. And I had a bad night. And Tara was already in bed, so I couldn't complain to her. And the rage just kept me up all night. And I went outside and punched a tree for a while. I finally this morning figured it out. Tara: [45:41] I'd just like to remind you, the only reason that I did two extra credits back to back is because I sat in for you last week. So if you had done last week's extra credit, which you were scheduled to do, then we would be talking about important TV dairy products right now. Boom. Sarah, you already said you picked Keanu. Go ahead. Sarah: [45:58] Yes, I did. It is a fairly wee needle to thread that Tara has presented us with. You want a person who is known, but not for anything problematic, not for being a shock comic, but they have enough edge that the kids or cynical Gen Xers and over TV consumers like us will be like, huh, let's see how it goes. Plus, it's a pretty broad skill set required that you have to fit through the eye of this needle. You need some singing, you need some improv when things get weird, like someone slapping the host. You gotta have a sense of humor about yourself, etc. and so on. Sarah: [46:34] I thought Keanu was probably a terrible idea for this, and then I started trying to slot him into each one, and I was like, this actually isn't a horrible idea. So let's go in order. Hosting The Muppet Show. Do I think he is a natural at this? Not necessarily, but he is sort of equally impassive, let's say, in every role. He is very used to green screen and motion capture acting. I don't think adapting to a puppet set of sight lines is going to be a huge challenge for Keanu. And he is very famously in a band and presumably can carry the singing or musicianship bits of it. Hosting Saturday Night Live. I cannot believe he's never hosted. He must be offered it every month. Like just an automated thing pops up on Lorne Michaels' phone and he's like, reach out to Keanu and Keanu's like still no. i can see him thinking improv and live is super not for him i'm not sure every saturday night live writing class is cut out to write for that kind of guest but if they can manage fucking j-lo and trump i feel like this show could do a lightish lift for him get alex winter to cameo to back him up on like weekend update or something i feel like it's doable. Sarah: [47:51] Also think now it's like been too long and it's now a thing. Capital T and he's never going to do it. Guest hosting Jimmy Kimmel live. This one is tougher. But again, if you can get Winter or another co-star slash bandmate to sit near him or do the hosting and let him be the band leader. But on the other hand, staring into the skit of Keanu not being great or natural off the cuff or especially hilarious could also work. It's only one night he could just play up the monotone and they can get guests who understand the joke and the assignment as far as helping him through an interview. Sarah: [48:31] Cameos themselves on the studio. This one is easy. I think he would do it. You could even just have him sleeping in a trailer visible like through a crack in the door. Light lift. Present at the Oscars. Yes, he's already done that. It's fine. Anyone can present. And unfortunately, sometimes that works against the broadcast, but it's 90 seconds hosting. I don't love, but I just don't love that they have a host. It takes too long. The mobile game, he seems like actually a natural for this. If Jesse fucking Pinkman can do online gambling ads in the most self-serious way possible, I'm sure Keanu can rock some off-brand two dots thing while dressed as Neo, give his paycheck to charity, and that'll just make land office money for the game. And that is my list. I had a couple backups, but once I thought of Keanu, I was like, This is perfect in how mid he would be at almost all of this. So I went with it. Tara: [49:28] Yeah. Dave: [49:29] The game is based on the lake house. Those are two dots you have to connect. Sarah: [49:34] Yeah. There you go. Tara: [49:35] I'll go next. I also had a few that I thought of and then had to take off the list. Kristen Bell has also famously never hosted Saturday Night Live, but she has guest hosted Kimmel oddly. Kirsten Dunst hosted SNL. Jesse Plemons has not hosted SNL, but is probably too fancy to do the mobile game, I feel like. And then I thought Olivia Colbin, but thought she probably would be out for mobile game and Kimmel. I don't assume she knows who Jimmy Kimmel is. So my pick is Steven Yeun. Hosting the Muppet Show, he appears in the first ever episode of I Think You Should Leave, so one could argue he already has experience acting with Muppets for Tim Robinson. Tara: [50:16] Hosting Saturday Night Live, he's definitely famous enough and has starred in buzzy enough stuff to be considered for this. In fact, I was surprised he hadn't already done it when he was on The Walking Dead. Guest hosting Kimmel. Seems like something he would be okay doing as a lark. As a talk show guest, he's very easygoing and charming and seems like someone who could talk to anyone easily. Cameos themselves in the studio. I think if Seth Rogen doesn't already know him, they're probably only about one degree of separation apart. Easy for them to get him. Prince Enting of the Oscars, he's already starred in an Oscar-winning movie, Minari. And the mobile game, I think his persona is not so prestigy that this would be out of the question for him. Plus, he did a bunch of national commercials on his way up for Milky Way and Best Buy and stuff. So he might like to make some easy money to finance something fancier that he has in mind. So Steven Yeun is my pick. Now, we're all waiting with bated breath. Dave, who did you land on in the end? Dave: [51:15] I couldn't think of anybody. End of show. Tara: [51:17] Thank you. Dave: [51:19] My choice is Matt Berry. Tara: [51:21] Matt Berry! Sarah: [51:22] Ooh. Uh-huh. Tara: [51:24] Yep. Dave: [51:24] For The Muppet Show, he is, as Adam Gorsworth pointed out, one of the best capable hosts because he is both actor and singer, doer of stupid stuff. He's got the trifecta, all the ingredients you need to be a successful Muppet Show guest. Saturday Night Live, same, but I would insist that he also does the credit voiceover that week. Sarah: [51:46] Yes. Dave: [51:47] Kimmel, he's an industry veteran, so he could do that, but also it would be an excuse to have U.S. famous Brits on all week or whatever they do there. On the studio, he's up for a big part in the U.S., but U.S.-U.K. idiom differences wreck havoc on the process. The Oscars, he isn't a presenter per se. He's there to read all the nominations from every category. Tara: [52:15] Yes. Dave: [52:16] And then when somebody wins, he does the Stephen Toast. Yes. Including the death roll call segment. At the end of that, as a remember, everybody passed away. Yes. And for the game, he's promoting a game called sheep kingdom, where you are a sheep king who has to match three things that involve sheep. and Barry plays King Wooly in the ad and he's got like a sheep head over his. That's it. Tara: [52:48] Good job, everybody. Dave: [52:52] Well, guys, that is it for another episode of Extra, Extra Hot Great. We discussed life in the gutter with the cast of Brady Bunch on Celebrity Bowling before answering your burning Ask EHG questions like what pilot is Wishbone doing and can you make a bagel like a three-year-old would? Dave's tiny pitch for Oregon's local reporting canon met with exploding success. We celebrated those who weren't quite the best and worst of the week and wrap it all up with three candidates who can do it all. Next up, it's the Burbs. Remember, we're listening. I am David T. Cole, and on behalf of Tara Arianna. Tara: [53:36] Yes! Dave: [53:37] And Sarah D. Bunting. Sarah: [53:40] Whoa. Dave: [53:42] Thanks for listening, and we'll see you next time right here on Extra Extra Hot Great. Clips: [53:57] All right, Fred, you can take your hands out of your ears.